Becoming a more esponsible Communicator
My fiancé and I spend a
lot of time talking, analyzing and discussing how we communicate. I think to a
certain extent this is partly due to being enrolled in this class, but either
way, doing this has greatly helped with our relationship. The section of the
book that talks about becoming a more responsible communicator really brought
into focus and helped to clarify the overall goals that my fiancé and I have
been striving for. When emotions and tensions are high, I’ve found that I’m not
often the best at communicating. Being able to help review what I’m about to
say has helped immeasurably. But oftentimes, I found myself wondering how best
to evaluate what it was that I wanted to say, and how to adjust what my initial
thoughts are into a more meaningful message. The questions in the four-way test
were very interesting to read. Is it the truth? This one can often be colored
by personal perspective, or impressions. Is it fair to all concerned? Sometimes
it might not be, and that’s okay, as long as you think about it and understand
that. Will is build goodwill and better friendships? In a conversation with
someone you’re in a relationship with, I believe this should almost always be a
priority. Will it be beneficial to all concerned? Again, perhaps not, but
understanding whether it is or not will be very helpful. All in all, I found
that I read this part of the chapter very quickly because it applied very well
to my current ways of communicating.
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ReplyDeleteIt's fabulous when two people, from any type relationship, make a commitment to be "responsible communicators." Of course, this can be best seen and bear the most positive enhancements to an intimate partner relationship, and sometimes we have to be willing to hear things we don’t want to hear, but need to be said.
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone in not being the best communicator when things heat up. Most of us struggle in this area, but taking a step back to consider what and how to communicate what needs to be said, definitely pays off. Hats off to you for learning and applying this lesson, and all the best to you and your fiancee!
I really like this class because it drew my attention to communication and how we interact with other. Without being concerned about communication we can loose those whom we love, and it is really true that some things need to be said, even if we don't want to hear those ... We need to keep balance between hurtful communication and critique
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